Just what does “loving without attachment” really mean? Well, let me ask you this: when a [romantic] relationship, or a marriage, comes to an end, does it feel to you that your world came crashing down and life, as you knew it, is over? If you answered yes to this question, then you’re in for the [unnecessary] heartbreak of your life!
Loving without attachment means you have the capacity to get on with your life, on your own two feet. It means that if anyone leaves your life, be it by choice or by force, of any kind, you won’t fall apart but will instead graciously accept it and go do you. It means that you recognize your own individuality and are not dependent upon anyone for what ought be, your own happiness. It means that you have a good, clear and stable understanding of life, love and people and could easily enjoy these, afresh and by yourself. It results in less pain, less drama, and new-found freedom!
The reason that we suffer so intensely when a certain loved one departs from our lives is that we made that person our central focus and did not take into consideration the fact: that life offers us no guarantee that everyone we know and love shall be, in our lives for evermore. Unfortunately, we act as though life and everything about it or in it, is permanent, when, really, we all know that this is not the case.
As difficult and painful as was the death of my closest loved ones, their passing away was what reinforced this understanding and stance in my life. People always point out how “strong” I am, especially since I have no signs to show that I’m even “falling apart” and that’s because I have no reason to fall apart.
I realized, long ago, that life on earth is temporary; that no one lives forever on this plane; that people come and go from our lives, all the time, and that I am free to count myself in, as valuable, and to love my self, as well. Too often, I witness people wanting to die just because his or her partner walked out on them. Some would cry, “But we were together for 8 months!” Others, “But we were together for 25 years!” That it doesn’t matter! What does matter is, “knowing” – that we are an individual with our own path; are never “alone” if walking with God; and how to, and that we may: live, loving, without attachment.